People wonder all the time how an enraged parent could assault a league official because of a youth sporting event. The question I have is why it doesn’t happen more often?
There are certainly many parents that enjoy the participation of their kids without any outrageous behavior; however, there are many parents that walk the emotional boundary line of acceptability on a regular basis. Violent behavior doesn’t just come out of nowhere. It comes out of an emotionally enmeshed relationship where the parent tries to live through the accomplishments of the child and is devastated when there is perceived failure. Incest is when a parent or another adult gets their needs met from their kids. Youth sports are filled with unfulfilled adults that have surrendered their lives to their kids as they travel from one sporting event to another.
Kids were never meant to meet the emotional needs of adults. They are to be the recipients of the kind of mentoring and parenting that is the result of emotionally healthy adults that have grieved their own disappointments so they can allow their children to enjoy their activities without feeling as though they have to save their parents from a life of utter emptiness. The problem is that these types of parents are everywhere and are interfering with the lives of their kids on every level.
The event in the above link is a wake up call to the fact that we need to do something to save our kids from feeling like it is their jobs to save their parents and other emotionally empty adults from a life of despair. Youth sport associations need to provide mandatory parent education combined with high standards of character and sportsmanship. We do no favors to anyone by allowing parents and other adults to extract their well being and life’s joy from their children and other kids. This is backwards and needs to be addressed or more of these types of incidents will occur. Lets be courageous for the sake of all the kids that are silently screaming for us to lead the way and challenge adults to “get a life of their own”.