There is no doubt that we are living in a time where many of our young people have become overly dependent on the prompts, punishments, and promises of others in their lives. In an attempt to get this to change, parents, coaches and teachers have tried many things to “motivate” young people.
This is the third of a 5-part series on Motivation Myths:
Motivational Myth #1: Kids need to be motivated. (See 4/7/10 blog entry)
Motivational Myth #2: Rewards are what motivate kids. (See 4/8/10 blog entry)
Motivational Myth #3: Lectures motivate kids.
Today I want to talk about the Lecture Myth. It seems that those of us trying to create more energy, passion, or drive in our kids believe that our words are so profoundly inspiring that simply stating them with a bit of passion behind them is suddenly going to turn on the light bulb of drive for our kids. This is not only a myth, but it is utter ignorance. What has led us to believe that our lectures could possibly be that full of impact? Maybe we revert to this because it is the only tool we have available to us. If so, then it makes sense why we engage in this act of desperation. When we use a lecture, that in reality is one-way communication, we cut off the most important information source (that being the kid) because the communication is only one way.
In order to create any change it is going to begin with the cooperation, will, and enlightenment of the kid needing to make the change. We miss that when we believe we are the providers of the motivation because of our perceived words of wisdom. Our kids would have a revival of energy, drive, passion, and motivation if we would simply talk WITH them and not AT them. If the only tool for motivation you have is to lecture…it is time to add to the toolbox. You will be absolutely shocked what you learn if you approach problems of motivation with curiosity as opposed to certainty.
No more lectures…get out of judgment/certainty and into curiosity!
Keep an eye out for Motivation Myth #4!